Sunday, February 8, 2015

Fall From Grace

Fall From Grace

How many people you are to me
Not just my Daddy, my first Preacher too,
Making bridges to understanding
So many lessons you’ve taught…

Ride a bike, say a Prayer,
Catch a fish, play a great hand,
Tell a joke, write a poem,
All these things and more…

Sometimes you taught without
Meaning to, your endless wanderlust
Teaching me to make friends quickly
Before we moved on yet again… 

Mother leaving, time and again,
Instructing me what it meant to be loyal.
Taking her back to oft’ to count
Loving her despite unspeakable things…

The pedestal I placed you on so high
You almost reached Heaven itself.
How must it have felt to live
Amongst the Angels in the clouds…
   
How was I to know exactly how
Far you could fall from Grace
Smashing, shattering, scattering
My ideal, my heart, my Faith…

The Sin you wreaked upon my
Innocent Sister spilling like Blood
Upon freshly washed white linen;
Stains that never wash out…

Re-coloring every memory
Those stains have done
Tainted every aspect of my
Relationship with you…
  
Trying to move forward seems
Impossible to me, like walking barefoot
On the broken glass that was my ideal
I falter, I trip, I fall…

Wanting to strip from my veins
Your blood and very essence
Searching blindly for some peace
Knowing it will never be…

Love I hold for you still and always
Overwritten with guilt, despair and shame
Can you teach me, Father Dear, one last thing
How I am now to overcome?

 Written for my Dad
March 29,2008

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